30 and beautiful
I have heard it a million times- Life begins at 30?
Does it really, so what happened 30 years ago? What the hell was that?
At 30, everything is different; a slight sepia tone descends on your very existence. The entire picture looks a wee old and worn at the edges.
By 30 you have already gone through a lot in life, a childhood spent being victimized by the education system, where your school bags were heavier than your mother, where competition almost killed you, where all your freedom was curtailed by a dictator styled regimented existence, aimed at making you a better person and/or preparing you for the tempests that lay ahead( like really).
A childhood where it was the birth right of every teacher to treat you like you were in Auswitchz. Where all your parents ever worried about was whether their son would end up as a doctor or an engineer. Existence back then was beautiful. A peerless mirror of what lay ahead.
Teenage came with a BANG!!! literally, if it wasn’t the acne it was the million heart breaks that killed you. You suddenly realized you had a heart, which was meant to be trampled over. Baggy trousers and cool shirts with copious amounts of hair gel were your best friends. You were cool (or so you thought?) You were the epitome of every girl’s dream (who were you kidding?)
Teenage lasted almost forever, for the longest time you kept wondering would this ever end? It dragged along till you almost got sick of it and were even ready to sell your soul to devil just to be an adult.
And then one fine day just out of the blue you were an adult, teenage was passé.
Life was brilliant, alcohol, and drugs took over. Bright colors, drunken orgies and more bright colors were the edifice of your existence. Green was your favorite shade. You were never ever satisfied with your surroundings, everything always had to keep changing, it was fast but far from furious. There was an animal inside that needed to unleash. That’s when you became the rebel, you grew a beard, you had long hair one day which was gone the next. You had unleashed. You wore kurta’s and jeans you had to be different, you had to fight the system. You took part in every student union rally, you even went on hunger strikes, you were lathi charged by the police, you called your professor a wanker, you picked up fights, you bled, you made people bleed, you were arrested, you were bailed out, you were just discovering life.
You were an adult!!
And just as soon as this storm had hit you, it was gone, you were out of college as an adult, soon the animal within was tamed by the very system you fought. Bad paying jobs and idealism were now your building blocks. Hunger and cheap cigs kept your going. Women came and women went. Love what was that? You wanted to fall in love but it was a one way traffic.
On your own, with pennies in your pocket, you felt like a King, you wanted to buy gifts for your entire family with your first salary, but…
You were 20 something and broke. Savings? What were those?
And then in your mid 20s you wanted to study more, so you earned scholarships to go abroad and educate your self.
It was all new, you were a professional out to get a cutting edge education. But you were brown, poor and on a meager scholarship. You worked part time jobs as cleaners, waiting tables, on construction sites just to make sure you paid your loans and ate two decent meals a day. You worked very hard, harder than ever, you were always almost home sick, you missed your comfort zone, the animal turned king within was now beaten black and blue. You were never the same. A part of you died by the end of this.
Nearing 30’s and you were back, educated and regulated. Decent jobs with psycho bosses took over your life. You dreamt work, you lived work and almost died working. Your bosses always came from hell and you kept wishing for them to go back there.
They made your life painful, very painful. You hated your very existence.
Things were different now, you suddenly discovered stress and hyper tension.
The word blood pressure now meant more than some medical jargon your parents babbled about.
Pharmacies were now your favorite hang out joints. You also discovered that your hairline and waistline were now your worst enemies, they hated you and connived against you at all times.
Life nearing 30 was a relic of a once glorious past.
And then 30 dawned on you, it crept like cobra on a dark night and bit you. The poison caught you unaware, you were 30 and you were told that life has just begun.
1 comment:
Post a Comment