Jesus Stole My Thunder

The setting was just right, the month was December the year 1979 and I am sure it was a wee cold, to add to all that underlying excitement Christmas was just a few hours away. My mother was almost 8 months pregnant and I am sure sick of carrying me around. After spending days confined to her bed she my late father decided to bring in Christmas by watching the mother of all Indian Movies Sholay!!!!!.

Jai Veeru and Gabbar danced around trees and shot some bullets, the movies was just perfect Thakur without his hands ( I always wondered how he ever wiped his arse, I still do) Jai with his tight shirts and killer one liners, Veeru with his ‘I will jump off the water tank’ scene and last but not the least Gabbar with his famous ‘ yeh hath mujhe de de Thakur” ( give me those hands Thakur) dialogue , am sure was all and more than what my mother could handle and that’s when I decided to say Hello !!! to the world. Some 40 odd days premature I decided to jump onto the bandwagon called life. (though I still regret that decision of mine).

But lill did I know that Jesus would steal my thunder. I was, after all born on Christmas, Now, look at it from my perspective its not everyday that one is born, it just one of those once in a life time moments and I am sure ya want it to be perfect just like some other life defining, life changing moments that one seems to encounter every now and then . I mean think of this from a logical perspective, you are down on ya knee and asking the woman of ya dreams to marry you, (now that I am sure most will agree is a life defining moment), but to your utter bewilderment your best friend had, just a few minutes ago asked the same woman to marry him and she, as your luck would have it had said yes. Now that my friend epitomizes or rather illustrates the concept of stealing my thunder and to an extent after I found out who Jesus was ( sometime in my 1st grade) born on the same date as me, I felt cheated and used. May be that’s a crap analogy but then again everything that comes out of my wee head is either crap or way twisted.

So that’s what Lord Jesus did to me, some 2006 years ago, he decided to waltz into this world without ever realizing that many moons later he would be stealing my only thunder. Now now, don’t get me wrong here, its not like I never wanted Jesus around, but couldn’t he have like waited a day, I mean just one day but no, I mean what was the hurry, the Son of God chose just the day I chose to walk out . (I am sure a lot of you out there are going to label me as a heretic and my statements as blasphemous)

The strange thing is most people think its rather cool to share ya birthday with Jesus, but like really, come to think of it, half the people forget its your birthday and are too busy getting sozzled for Christmas and the other half are just too busy with their families celebrating the event of the year to give you a few minutes of their time and expecting them to do so would only be unfair.
So there, with every passing year as the hair on my head turns grey and the inches around my waist increases my angst against my birth date manifolds itself into levels unimaginable. Further still commercialization of the season hasn’t helped either, everywhere you go, you find Santa’s( on a crash diet) from Somalia walking around making an arse of themselves, sales and the festive furry just make all forget that hello!!! It’s my birthday……. Thus I can confidently rest my case and Say JESUS STOLE MY THUNDER!!!!!!