I find myself at crossroads, I find my self so deeply fucked in the head that redemption is no longer an option.

I promise my self every night that I will not unleash angst the following day, but it fucking hell never works.

I can only think of blood gore and murder for everyone here at work, the sight of most of them makes me sick and angsty
Just this afternoon I overate so that the others around would starve and be deprived of their meal.

It’s a crazy place my head, I want to walk into my boss’s chamber and shoot my self,
I want to walk into office and kill everyone

Maybe all I need is a fucking holiday, which I will never get,